The circle of Listening and Speaking

Communication is a circle. The way I speak affects the way you listen, and the way you listen affects the way I speak. The art of listening and speaking is often taken for granted, and we often do not feel a need to train ourselves to be better listeners and speakers. How much do we actually hear as to the importance of these two skills of communication in our education system?

The importance of listening may be missed because it’s a silent skill, but mastering this skill is fundamental for effective communication. It’s not surprising that it is easier to send messages than receiving them as an adult, because, as a child, this is not part of the education system.

Listening Is a skill. Just because we can hear does not mean we are skilled listeners. Hearing is as automatic as breathing, but listening is purely mental. We select what we want to pay attention to by certain sounds and sound patterns. Listening is an active process and a skill. Good listening must be practiced as we develop our unique ability and do it in different ways that work for us. The first step is to become consciously aware of being a better listener. What we focus on is where our attention goes.

We listen through filters. The way we select what we pay attention to is a result of the listening filters we have developed through our life. Some of the things that affect how we listen are:

  • Language – our vocabulary and word meanings and interpretation might determine what we are hearing.
  • Culture – family, ethnicity, groups, and nationality have a bearing on our listening.
  • Values, attitudes, beliefs, assumptions – we accumulate these from parents, teachers, friends, and role models. Strongly held beliefs can determine what we listen to and what is important.
  • Intentions, expectations, emotions – in anything, our intentions are important as we might expect to meet certain outcomes or goals. Our emotional state at the time will affect our listening as well.

Our listening filters create our reality because they determine both what we choose to listen to and what we make it mean.

Everyone’s Listening Skills Are Unique; we are all special and unique because we listen through filters. Our personal path and journey have formed our unique listening. It is very common for all speakers to assume that we all listen the same way. We are all special.

We Can Change Our Listening; this is done by taking control of our listening, which starts with becoming conscious of our filters, explore different listening positions. What we focus on our attention follows.

I have been a member of Toastmasters for 26 years. What I enjoy about Toastmasters is the personal growth and confidence I have gained in both communication and leadership skills. The mentorship, as well as the helpful evaluations, was received for positive personal growth. Without Toastmasters, I would not have been able to overcome a severe Stutter. I am an overcomer, Stutter to Public Speaker, Toastmaster to Podcaster.

 

Mission Statement for Toastmasters is: 

We provide a supportive and positive learning experience that empowers members to develop communication and leadership skills, resulting in greater self-confidence and personal growth.

Toastmasters International Core Values

  • Integrity
  • Respect
  • Service
  • Excellence

 

Education Pathways available:

  • Presentation Mastery
  • Dynamic Leadership
  • Engaging Humor
  • Innovative Planning
  • Leadership Development
  • Persuasive Influence
  • Strategic Relationships
  • Team Collaboration
  • Visionary Communication
  • Effective Coaching
  • Motivational Strategies

 

Wascana Toastmasters Club #577, Regina, Sask.

Wascana Toastmasters Club is open to anyone who would like to improve their communication and leadership skills. Communication is one to one, one to few, or one to many. Everything we do in toastmasters is evaluated positively for improvement in all areas of our lives.

BLT Advanced Toastmasters Club #6584, Regina, Sask.

To become a member of BLT Advanced Club, a member must have achieved a certain level of achievement in any Toastmasters Club. In an Advanced Club, the members can provide better quality evaluations and mentoring skills.

Contact information:

Find a Club at:  www.toastmasters.org

If you find articles like this helpful, please send me an email with your thoughts and suggestions, as I would love to hear from you. I appreciate it if you would take the time to like my Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/donrosomspeakspodcast/

share this on:

Share on linkedin
Share on facebook
Share on pinterest
Don Rosom

Don Rosom

I have had to overcome many fears, obstacles and adversities in my life, which have led to success and victories. I hope my guest will inspire you to never give up regardless of how big or small your obstacles may be. My hope is that the inspiration you will receive will ‘pave your path to stress free living’.  Thank you for tuning in and I look forward to your comments and would ask that you please share this podcast with others. I appreciate if you would like my Facebook Page ‘Don Rosom Speaks’

View all podcasts
Don Rosom

Don Rosom

I have had to overcome many fears, obstacles and adversities in my life, which have led to success and victories. I hope my guest will inspire you to never give up regardless of how big or small your obstacles may be. My hope is that the inspiration you will receive will ‘pave your path to stress free living’.  Thank you for tuning in and I look forward to your comments and would ask that you please share this podcast with others. I appreciate if you would like my Facebook Page ‘Don Rosom Speaks’

View all podcasts